Depression

Woah, big surprise. I am depressed.

My friends had been arguing over what was best for me because of it. I was told threats were used, there was crying, and lots of hate. I think it might have been making me worse, but it was my own fault. It was my problem, and they were arguing about it. I should have made them stop as soon as I knew what was going down.

I got an inbox on facebook. Two actually. My boyfriend basically explained what happened between him and my friend. My friend told me she wanted out of my life. I did not understand what happened. I wrote her back, and she replied but had already removed me from facebook. The next night the same thing happened with my other friend and my boyfriend. I had no idea what to do.

In my kitchen today... on impulse (which I never actually do), I told my mom. I told her I was depressed. She understood, and I think I made the right choice. And then in the car she starts harassing me about the "scratches" on my arms. I avoided the topic with her, but later that night I ran. From my dad. I crawled under my bed covers. And he sat down and talked the rest of the story out of me.

Tonight I had a long talk with my boyfriend. Turns out he likes me a lot more then I thought.
Next I would prob say how I exactly feel... and maybe some other stuff. But he reads this blog.
But we had a long talk and worked out everything. He is one of a kind and actually understands me.

My dad told me he is going to call some one 'special', and get me the help I need. Is it okay to say I am terrified? There is no escape now. No turning back. Once you realize that it all doesn't seem so okay anymore...

~SilverMoon